Petrifying and pants begin with the same letter,P. Is this a coincidence? I don't think so. I love them on others. I truly do. My fellow bloggers wear them so chicly. Audrey Hepburn wore pants even Lady Gaga wear them on occasion. If these iconic and stylish women can wear them then why do I think that pants don't work for me? Is it four years of wearing almost nothing but skirts and dresses? Possibly but, I love jumpsuits, the middle ground between my beloved dress and pants. Is it because my rainbow striped jumpsuit is kind of ridiculous? Maybe. Pants just have too many variables: length,crotch depth, making sure it fits in both the waist and hip, avoiding the dreaded camel toe and visible panty line. Then you have all the different styles: flare,boot-cut,skinny,wide leg, tapered.Don’t even get me started on how much jeggings confuse me! It is too much! Calculus is easier than finding a suitable pair of pants. I don't want jeans. I have two pairs: skinny jeans and really tight skinny jeans.I need pants. Trousers if you will.
Pants project an image of power and know-what-you-are-talking-about-ness. Yves Saint Laurent liberated women by putting them in pants. I’m liberated, I guess. I could wear pants;I guess I’m afraid. Of all the things I’m afraid of, pants are by far the silliest. I shouldn't be afraid of them.I loved pants as a child,actually, I really enjoyed knit cotton pants but they were pants nonetheless. I think pants made me feel tougher and less vulnerable. Now, I just rely on cynicism and sarcasm. I wear pants ever day to work because I have to. They happen to be the least flattering pants ever made. Turns out the word unisex is a fancy way of saying, “these are man pants but we will make them small enough for you to fit into.” The only plus side of man pants: big pockets.
This year will be the year for many things: going to Paris,finally finishing 1984 and finding a pair of pants for me.